Bush declares Democratic Party a terrorist organization!

Nukes Boston's FleetCenter, the site of this years National Democratic Convention, in a defensive first strike.

Claims weapons of mass destruction, spirited out of Baghdad by anti-American Liberals prior to The President's liberation of Iraq, being harbored by The Democrats on convention site.

"It was us or them," said The President, falling even as he spoke from the seat of his black mountain bike into a rock filled ditch.

The President's security advisor, Condoleeza Rice, reached for comment regarding the nuclear strike against the Boston sports and entertainment stadium, said only:

"They're gonna' have to refund my Prince tickets now, right?" 

Green Party vice presidential running mate, Peter Camejo, said something about an avocado but nobody heard what it was.